If you know how to live life daily it becomes an awakening experience. Life can be super confusing…choices are questioned ~ relationships are complex. What if I were to tell you that you have only one decision in life. It’s not about your career, whom you want to marry, where you want to live? We are burdened everyday with choices but I’m here to say you can make one simple, choice: Do you want to be happy? Once that choice is decided your path in life is clear.

I think so many times people don’t think “happiness” is in their control. Of course we all want to be happy – but how can we be happy when we just lost our job, we got water in our basement, a loved one was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. The question is not contingent on preferences it’s simple – Do you want to be happy? The reason why we feel happiness is out of our control is that we put buts and ifs on it, we try and qualify it. We want to say that as long as I was employed with a dry basement with healthy loved ones then we will be happy – but/if not then what? Things that are out of our control are just that – out of our control. It’s in our reaction/response to these that creates our reality.

Once you decide that you choose happiness rather than the emotional drama that comes with “life” then everything else becomes simple. When everything is going great it’s easy to be happy- but the real test is in the big and small struggles. How do we respond when we are rear-ended, when the doctor is late, when we are laid off…. We are so quick to break our vow of happiness when these events take place. The question is not whether these events will happen- they will. The question is will you choose happiness in spite?

If you truly want to be happy you have to let go of the conditions. This is the entitled ego telling you there’s reason not to be happy. Choosing happiness is the only rational thing to do. Why shouldn’t you be happy? You gain nothing by being annoyed and stressed by life’s events. Committing yourself to happiness will teach you every single thing you need to learn about life and humanity. One of my favorite books on this subject is the Untethered Soul – Michael Singer speaks of “staying open” he suggests every time you feel unhappy – let it go. Use affirmations, meditate -find a space. No matter what happens you can choose to enjoy the experience. Enjoy the life that shows up – the good, the bad and the ugly.

I know it seems easier said than done- I get it. I’m not suggesting I don’t have my fair share of disappointing emotions, hurts, and sadness…times where I feel so closed off. I’m also not suggesting that shedding tears, running it out or hitting pillows is not in itself therapeutic but try to remember- “stay open” after all what’s the benefit of not choosing happy? My drama doesn’t change the outcome it just takes me longer to find peace in it.

I liken this to the practice of yoga- conscious, centered and committed. Cactus the arms- stay open- learn not to close. Affirm that you want to have peace and appreciation of life. Lastly- please don’t have your happiness be conditional upon other people. It’s hard enough that it is conditional upon you. You source your happiness – the minute you look to someone else for it, disappointment is sure to follow.

Can we find Joy in the unpleasant? Can we find Peace in the war? I choose yes ~ The path to your happiness comes down to one question- Do you want to be happy? If so – let it become your life’s mission to stay open when you want to close….. instead of that pity party choose a sunny soiree!

What does a self care junkie, enneagram 3, book in my hand love?  

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